Santa and a friend are sitting in a cinema. Just before the break they see a cactus and in some distance a cowboy. During the break the friend says to santa:"I bet the cowboy will ride into the cactus."
Santa answers: "I do not believe that."
They agree that the loser invites the winner to a bottle of wine after the film. It turns out that the friend wins. So after the film they drink together the bottle of wine in a restaurant near the cinema.
Then the friend says: "I must confess that the bet was not fair. I saw the film for the second time."
Then Santa replies: "And I saw it for the fourth time, but I did not think that this fool rides into the cactus again."
Santa Singh and Banta Singh were sitting on a tree and Santa Singh was singing a song.After 4 songs Santa Singh hung himself upside down and started singing again.
Banta Singh : Santa Singh, what is the matter with you? Why are you hanging upside down?
Santa Singh : I am singing the B side.
Santa Singh: "My doctor told me to drink carrot juice after a hot bath to cure my cold."
Banta Singh: "Does it work?"
Santa Singh: "I don't know... I can never finish drinking the hot bath."
A Surd prime minister visited the president of the neighbouring country and complained about all this jokes about surds that others tell each other. "This leads to the impression that all surds are stupid", he said. "You should not take this so earnestly",answered the neighbouring minister, "These are only jokes and not true stories. And there are also stupid people in our country. I will prove it to you."
Saying so, he went to his driver and said: "Please drive to my home and find out, whether I am at home." The driver immediately went on his way.
The surd prime minister was satisfied: "He is very stupid indeed. There is a public phone just at the corner. It would have been easier to call and check!"
Santa Singh is at the railway station. He asks a man "When will Rajdhani Express go from here?"
Man Replies 12.30.
"When will Deccan Queen go from here?"
Man Replies 11.30.
"When will Punjab Express go from here?"
Man Replies 10.30.
Santa singh goes on asking about all the trains.
Now the man gets fed up and asks whether he wants to go to punjab by train or not.
Santa replies, "No I just want to cross the tracks!"
★★★★★